The Beginning Part 2

As I try to organize documents this morning and process the amount of paperwork and timeline of it all I am a bit overwhelmed. However, I have so much to be thankful for and stand on His love and peace to power me through.

So, the real beginning of this journey didn't start just 8 months ago. The Lord began preparing our hearts shortly after we were married. Many of you know our hearts for hospitality. We both have large families and LOVE having people over. It doesn't happen near as often anymore with four children's schedules to work around, on top of our own commitments as adults. However, our hearts have not changed. In fact, I think they have only grown to desire it more.

Only 5 months into our marriage a young lady at our church was in need of a place to stay. Her situation was a sticky one, but my heart went out to her, probably because of past experience with one my sisters. Jason and I discussed the opportunity and decided to allow her to move in with us, provided she respected our space and general expectations. She was only there for about 6 weeks, but what an eye opener it was to share our space.

That Fall (2003) we were asked to open our home again. Our church was hosting a Connexions Leadership school and we lived just down the road. Several participants would attend the school from out of town, requesting for a home to stay in during the 11 month school year. One family had agreed to accept two participants, but wanted a few weeks for the foreign man to get acquainted before allowing another man to share his space. This was the request, to allow a young man to stay with us for only a few weeks during this transition period. Three weeks came and went, then turned into 11 months. We still call him our first child as he was only 18 when he moved in. He was an incredible blessing to both Jason and I. Watching him grow and where he is at today still moves my heart.

That next Fall, 2004, our first son was born. (Oh, I forgot to mention I was not only pregnant during most of that time, but also doing my last semester of college which included student teaching.) Then, a year and a half later we had another son. Some thought we were crazy, maybe we are. However, it has been such a joy to have them so close in age!

In 2006, Fall again, we had the opportunity to open our home once again. This time for one of our dearest friends. She had committed to the Connexions school as well. About a month or so before she was done with schooling, one of my sister's came to us with a great need. Her boyfriend, and father of her child, needed a place to stay, desperately. He had been living in a bad part of town and needed to get out. Our friend graciously gave up her space so that he could move in. He then resided with us for 6-8 months.

Although the experience of these two living with us was quite different from one another, the growth that Jason and I saw in ourselves was evident. My sister's boyfriend came from a broken home, was grieving many losses and still searching how God fit in His life. Our dear friend was single, still searching God's purpose for her life and wondering how marriage really worked when it was healthy. She has told us many times how God used us to show her how marriage can and is meant to be. This is NOT anything Jason and I did on our own. This is how God works. He moved our hearts to open our home which in turn, really forced us to communicate well. You can't really argue in front of people, at least not the screaming, throw stuff kind of arguments....not that we do that. BUT you think hard before you speak, you use a tone that is considerate and you learn to argue your point while accepting your spouse's. It wasn't easy, but looking back it was ONLY because of having people in our home that we learned how to communicate so well. However, God didn't stop here.

After having my sister's boyfriend live with us, our home became more of a refuge. Our hearts turned towards friends and family going through difficult times. Jason's brother moved in next, but only for a short period of time. But it was long enough to get him settled, seek some Godly advice and restart his direction in life. That was the summer of 2009 and shortly after our third child was born. He also helped us drywall the basement bedroom, which allowed for our next guests to move in. Yes I said guests, plural!

In October 2009 another sister came to me. Tears flood my eyes as I remember our talk on the front step. The fear in her voice, her broken spirit and the unknown of what was to come. It had been an emotional couple months for her family and she was now making the choice to leave her husband. A difficult choice to make. Due to the circumstances that surrounded her choice and the well being of her 4 children, we opened our home to them. The members of our household doubled, but God continued to pour out his grace upon us. I'm not gonna lie, it was NOT always easy. Sharing space, food, time and energy was exhausting some days. However, I wouldn't change one thing, not one thing at all! The Lord built forever, unique bonds during those 9 months. Not only for my sister and I, but for my husband and our niece. My niece struggled that year big time. She started the year under lots of stress and got sick. Her relationship with her father was broken and she was searching for answers. God used Jason to help her through some of those beginning steps. He provided her with a love, I believe, she hadn't received before from a father figure. He told her she was beautiful inside and out, and has continued to foster that relationship as best as he can.

Once again, God moved in our lives through opening our home. He proved that obedience brings blessings abundant. There were hard times, no doubt. But nothing that has overshadowed the success! My sister and her children moved out in June 2010. About 6 months passed until I received a phone call in December. A dear friend calling, in need. Her voice was so timid, her heart hurting and she was distraught over her situation. She, too, had made the difficult decision to leave her husband. She needed a place in town to stay until the courts could work through details. So, once again we moved furniture around to accompany her and her 3 children. The children weren't here at all times as they shared custody and had school in another town. However, they did require there own space which was understandable. So, for the next 5-6 months our family was doubled in size again. One of the biggest blessings that came out of this time was restoration to our friendship. You see, a year or two before this, my friend and I were closer. We had been getting together, but she was struggling even then. I noticed it was bringing me down and I felt I needed to cut off communication with her. It was NOT done right on my part and left her wondering. It wasn't that I completely shut her out, but I had needed space. During her time living here we were able to talk through that. God is AMAZING! Truly!

So, since summer 2011 our home has added just one more person, our daughter. We have not felt the call to open our home to any others during this time. Well, that is, until now. So, the beginning of the process to open our home to others, no matter what form it may take, started years ago. The Lord knew then that we would be going through this adoption process. He knew our hearts needed to be softened, our kids needed to understand how to share space and toys, and to know that our home is not just our own. Jason and I, and our children, are NOT perfect. We never will be. We will remain obedient to God though. For it is in our obedience that we are refined, walking away a better man with many more blessings.